This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize