Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
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