in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I didn't notice because vodka
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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