doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize
