I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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