Heybabeimwearingurpanties
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Randomize