oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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