I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
