Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
