Just cropdusted the office
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Randomize
