i just had sex bonerless
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
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