At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
No subtext here. People are naked.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
