so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
