I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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