I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize