i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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