Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
