she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
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