Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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