i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
