There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
