We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
