I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize