the new term for farting is butt boxing.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Randomize
