guys are not supposed to queef...right?
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
