I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Randomize
