Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
