I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
