I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
