Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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