So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
