just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
