Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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