at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize