Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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