Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
