Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize