Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize
