I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
and she was petting her beer can
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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