Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry prollyfake86 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(480): View more from Arizona

Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?

(325): View more from Texas

Because you touch yourself at night.

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(604): View more from British Columbia

What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping

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(281): View more from Texas

Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.

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(626): View more from California

obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that

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(859): View more from Kentucky

You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work

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(+61): View more from Australia

I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.

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(312): View more from Illinois

Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??

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(613): View more from Ontario

I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..

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