if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
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