I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Blood and glitter go together right?
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize