The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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