I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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