He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
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