My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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