She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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