I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
