i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
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