I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
They took my balls.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Randomize
