The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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