i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
