not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
